Oromo people weeding

Marriage is one of the most important rituals in the Oromo culture. There are three things Oromos talk about in life: birth, marriage, and death. These are the events that add to or take away from the family. Before the onset of foreign religions, namely Christianity and Islam, Oromo marriage rituals included exchange of gifts, mainly by the bride to be.

The ritual of courting begins a long time before the marriage date. It may entail encounters at events, mainly at weddings, or the courting may stem from understanding between the families. Once the boy has demonstrated responsibilities, not only for his own livelihood but also for the society in which he lives, he picks the girl he is interested in. He will inform a family member, usually his father, who then contacts the family of the girl. Usually the girl knows of the boy's intent and, in many instances, she encourages him to pursue her in this way. There are mediators, such as the girl's best friends, who convey the girl's wishes to the boy.

The first visit to the girl from the family of the groom-to-be involves other elders from his village. Special clothing is worn to underscore the importance of the meeting. A stick called "siinqee" is carried to the bride-to-be's house and left at the door to indicate to her parents that the process of courting their daughter has begun in earnest. On the second visit, the "siinqee" may come in with the groom's party indicating the girl's family has accepted the gesture. Visits by the groom's party may continue over the course of two years. The visits will prepare the way for acceptance of the young man, not only by the girl's immediate family, but by her relatives as well. It may also happen that the future son-in-law must till the land of his future in-laws - the idea is to make parents' sure that their daughter is marrying into a family who can support their daughter and her needs.

Once the needs of all relatives are satisfied, the actual date for a marriage will be set. On the date of the wedding, gifts for the bride's family are brought by an assembly of well-respected elders who join the wedding party. Bringing home the new bride is an all day process. Without the presence of knowledgeable elders, the marriage can be delayed. Once the groom is home with his new bride, the wedding party may take another three or more days to complete. This is a period when the groom's family and relatives bring presents. In old days, Oromos never married within their immediate clans, and today some Oromos continue to abide by that restriction. However, with the introduction of foreign religions and influences, times are changing the marriage traditions of the Oromo people and many Oromo marriages resemble marriages of Western or Middle Eastern cultures.

Since girls have to marry into different clans in traditional Oromo society, their relatives are almost always some distance away. Traditional Oromo wedding rituals fostered understanding and interconnectedness between different societies as well shattering a stereotypical myth that African societies were at war with one another before the arrival of foreigners, mainly Europeans and Arabs